THOUGHTS AT THREE A.M.

WHEN STANDARDS ARE TESTED!

For some reason as I woke this morning I was remembering this old quarrel I have heard for most of my life; that every woman has her price. I heard it first as a young child, at a big family gathering, amongst men to whom I was invisible simply because I was so young,playing with other children who were not listening, but I was, and I never forgot it.If you are unaware of this argument, I will briefly reiterate it.Most men say that a woman,even with the highest standards, has her price for bestowing her favors upon a man,be it money, jewels,furs, or other valuables...if she is approached right, she can be bought. The other side says, that some women cannot be bought with anything less than love/engagement/marriage,and that no amount of wining and dinning,charm and wooing can convince a true lady to "give up" that which cannot be taken back.There is also a third side that says that even the love/engagement/marriage lady is accepting a price, which is the love....etc. Personally, I have always discounted that third side as being just total disrespect for women all the way around,and a cynical attitude at best.

My father reinforced this standard with a little joke I know I have mentioned before. It was the first "off-color" joke I ever heard,and he didn't tell it to amuse, insult, or laugh at me, he did it to give me a man's perspective,the summer I "came of age," as a warning: He: would you, for a million dollars? She: Of course! He: How about $50? She: Hey! What kind of girl do you think I am? He: We've already established that, now we're haggling over the price!

I still remember how shocked I was,and how deeply I blushed, and said" Daddy!" But Dad just shrugged,and said," So, now you know." Hindsight being what it is, I see now that he used that simple, and clean illustration to open a whole avenue of conversation with me that might never have been found with a long, drawn out boring diatribe of do's and don'ts. I found out that men also have this amazing notion that once a woman has been married, and knows what delights the marriage bed can offer, she can never go back to being pure, or have high standards again.Some men ace in not getting it.In not understanding that a woman doesn't think that way.Once the door has been opened, It can be closed again.I was in the middle of a divorce, when Yon son was just little bitty guy,and even though my husband found me less interesting than his latest girl,( whom in my estimation was way too young for him,and not very pretty ) I was astonished at the number of men that came on to me. One night in particular stands out.My mother and my sister decided that I stayed home with my child way too much,and so they got together,and sent me to see " My Fair Lady" alone, all dressed up, in a cab, with enough mad money to stop after the theater and have coffee. I loved the show, and after, on a nostalgic whim, I went to "The Dragon"...a little Chinese place my husband and I frequented often during our courtship. As I sat there, in our spot, drinking my wo hop tea, and nibbling almond cookies, I looked around and thought about "him",completely oblivious to the fact that I was being watched by anyone.As I poured out the last cup, Mi came up to me, and said, " There is a gentleman who would like to meet you.He asks if he may join you in another pot of tea." I wasn't in the mood to meet anyone,and I almost said no,but then she pointed him out, and he looked very nice,and Mi said," You will be very safe here." She had always been our waitress,before, so I trusted her word. So,I agreed, and the gentleman came over, hat in hand, and was so pleasant and complimentary he boosted my morale almost immediately.We talked and drank tea for over an hour,and I laughed like I hadn't laughed in months and months.He was very charming, and looked at me with great admiration.Finally, I told him I had to go, and he offered me a ride home,and to pay the check. I let him pick up the tab, but under no circumstances  was I going to allow him to drive me home.Mi called me a cab,and he waited with me.We traded phone numbers, but he asked me not to call him until he called me first. The phone was ringing when I opened the door at home. My first question to him was, how did you get home so fast? You were still standing in front of the Dragon when I left! He said, I am calling you from my car.At that time, only the very wealthy had phones in their cars.Well! The implications of that statement stilled my voice,and he took advantage of my silence,to make me a proposal.He told me he was married, but it was an arranged marriage,and he wasn't happy.He said when he saw me that night, his heart just leaped in his chest, and that I was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen,and he had enjoyed our time together more than he could put into words.With respect, he outlined his intentions.He was able and willing to draw up a contract between us, set me up in an apartment, any size, with plenty of room for myself and my son, with anything I wanted in it,completely private, and he would pay for everything.He would also give me a brand new car, furs, jewels, trips, and spending money, as well as charge accounts at any store, anywhere.My son would have the best of everything, clothes, schools,medical care,sports equipment,a nanny, and would accompany us on outings and trips.In addition, he would set up a totally private bank account in my name, so I would never have to worry about money again.All I had to do, was to be available to him, once or twice a week,and not see any other man.He said he was sorry, but a divorce for him was out of the question, but if he had seen me first,it would be marriage he would be offering me, and not this arrangement. I toyed with the idea of being in the lap of luxury for an instant,and then I said, no.Secretly I could appreciate the courage it took him to come forward with the offer, so I wasn't unkind with my rejection, and I didn't act all falsely insulted.I told him I was flattered that he would ask, but that I just couldn't live that way.That in the eyes of God, it would be a sin.(Now I want you to understand that this was years before I got saved, but I still knew it was wrong.)Not only because of the "availability" aspect, and all that it implies,but because man is not my source of provision,God is,and making a deal like that is as much as saying God cannot meet all my needs.After that, I heard from that gentleman from time to time, he would call just to see how things were going,and once in a while he would send a card or a letter with a few dollars in it, or occasionally, he would send me a gift, but I never saw him again,and he never made that offer again either.I have never regretted turning him down, but I have often wondered what my life would be like, now, had I taken him up on it.I am sure I am far better off for having gone the way I did. For years, I thought that was my one big test. Not so. I just had another one recently. We had met years ago through my place of employment, and we met recently, by chance,and when he found out I was single, he began to pursue me. He knew what I liked,and he took me places he knew I would want to go, or he would bring my favorite beverage and a movie and we would spend the evening cuddling on the couch,and he would be oh so kind to get me things so I would have no problem getting around.There was no surprises awaiting him around the bend, he knows my health conditions,and he made every effort to take care of me.Finally, he popped the question, but there was one provision, which he did not tell me about until long after I had the engagement ring on my finger.He thought we should live together for six months to a year before we got married, just so we wouldn't be making a big mistake. That is when I began to look at him with a much sharper eye than before.He was perfectly willing to have church, or bible study with me, or with the family, but I began to look him in the eye, when the preacher would make a point that thrilled me, or was important.I would look at him, still with a grin on my face, or a sparkle in my eye,and saw, nothing.No answering smile or grin, no sparkle.His eyes were flat, emotionless as a cast iron skillet.So, I broached the subject, and sure enough, he had no love of the Lord in his heart.He would allow church, bible study,and all the preaching I wanted, but I knew that would all change once we were married.So, knowing what his reaction would be, I took off the ring, told him the living together before marriage was a no go for sure,and away he went.Once again, I was offered the world, for he was well off too, but underneath, it was all a ploy to get around me, and thank God, I did not fall to temptation!

Thank you, Father!

OUI?

WHY DON'T DOCTORS TELL WOMEN THE TRUTH?

I thought things had changed since I was young, having female problems, but apparently, they, or rather, shall I say, the doctors, have not. I was gypped into having a radical surgery years ago, that could have been taken care of, without robbing me of my ability to have more children, and now, I have found out that my niece is about to undergo something similar,and I know she hasn't been told the truth! If she had, she wouldn't have this la-de-dah, it's no big deal attitude! My sister told me about it a couple of days ago, and I hit the ceiling! I am so frightened for my niece, I just have to write to her and warn her to get a second opinion. In this day and age, there is no excuse for a doctor, male or female to side-step the emotional , mental, and physical aspects of a patient undergoing surgical procedures that will impact their hormones! I am certain that whomever this doctor is, he or she said nothing about the possible consequences of this procedure,because my niece is a very intelligent, attractive relatively young woman, who has not yet found Mr. Right,and hasn't used her...equipment. It would be a travesty of the highest order for her to do away with any possibility of having children, just because this doctor would rather slice and dice, rather than find other options to treat her problem. Understand me now, If this is her choice, and she doesn't find it repellent to end up childless, I have no problem with that. Not all women are cut out to be mothers, as we all know.However, I really don't think that is the case.When Yon son was born, she was about 4 years old,and she became so attached to him, she just mothered him all the time,and they had a very special connection all through school.So, how does a young woman still of child bearing age, just throw away any hope of having children under those circumstances? One wonders.She has a good job, with an excellent income, so why did she buy a house, if she never plans to have kids?

Personally, I think it all goes back to the snow-job she got from her doctor, and how much more money he will make from surgery, rather than medical treatment, which would involve medicine and tests.

Update. Now, I have to contradict myself.I have just been in contact with my niece,and it appears that there was a great deal of information left out of my conversation with my sister. I mean, A LOT! It seems this problem goes back years,unbeknownest to me,which her mother certainly should have known about, and I didn't, and she neglected to tell me a multitude of  important aspects of the circumstances surrounding this major situation.Instead, she told me just enough to get me all upset and excited,and then gave me my niece's new address.Well, that is tantamount to winding up a top ,and setting it loose.But, now that I know the true facts of the situation, my dear niece gets my full support.Sorry sis! That's just the way life is sometimes-and our kids have to live their own lives,regardless of whether we like it or not!

OUI?

FROM AMONGST MY CHILDHOOD BOOK-SHELVES!

Our home wasn't grand enough to have one room we could use as a library, so the several bookcases we had, were sprinkled around the whole house.One or two graced every room, but the kitchen. At least one in each bedroom,two or three in the living room, opposite the wall where the baby grand piano made it's fairly permanent home,considering one doesn't usually move them around a lot,and at least three in the dinning room, since that was where we did our homework.We had everything from sci-fi, to all manner of reference works, such as the dictionary,Roget's, and encyclopedia,and books of poetry and classic fiction.One of my favorites called,"Poems Teachers Ask for" was a really old book. I can still see it...a dusty brown, with black lettering,and a soft fabric binding that had already begun to shred.Every move we have made was complicated by dozens of boxes of books, and I always figured that somewhere in that pile, was that book.Well, I was wrong.Somewhere along the line, at some point,several of my faves have drifted away, that book of poetry included.Worse yet, the one poem that I have always loved, " The Calf Path" I could only recall in part, and I had forgotten, or never knew, the author of the poem.I have searched and searched for years to find it again, hampered greatly by the one piece of knowledge that would have made it easy.Needless to say, I have now finally found it, or I wouldn't be writing this piece,and now, faithfully rendered, I present it to you, for your enjoyment,and edification.

                                                             THE CALF PATH

One day, thru the primeval wood

a calf walked home, as good calves should;

But made a trail, all bent askew,

a crooked trail, as all calves do.

Since then 300 years have fled, and

I infer the calf is dead.

But still, he left behind his trail

and thereby hangs my mortal tale.

The trail was taken up next day

By a lone dog that passed that way.

And then, the wise bell weathered Sheep

pursued the trail, o're vail and steep,

and drew the flocks behind him too

As good bell weathers always do.

And from the day, o're hill and glade                                              

thru those old woods a path was made

And many men wound in and out,

and dodged and turned and bent about,

and uttered words of righteous wrath,

Because t'was such a crooked path,

But still they followed, do not laugh,

the first migrations of that calf .

And thru the winding woodways stalked,

because he wobbled, when he walked.

The forest path became a lane

That bent, and turned, and turned again.

This crooked lane became road

Where many a poor horse with his load

toiled on beneath the burning sun

and traveled some three miles in one.

And thus a century and a half,

they trod the footsteps of that calf.

The years passed on in swiftness fleet,

the road became a village street.

And this, before men were aware,

a cities crowded thoroughfare.

And soon the central street was this

Of a renowned metropolis.

And men, two centuries and a half

Trod the footsteps of that calf.

Each day a 100 thousand route

followed the zig-zag calf about,

and o'er his crooked journey went

the traffic of a continent.

A 100 thousand men were led

By one calf near three centuries dead.

They followed still  his crooked way,

and lost 100 years per day....

for thus such reverence is lent

to well established precedent.

A moral lesson this might teach,

were I ordained...and called to preach.

For men are prone to go it blind along the calf paths of the mind,

And work away from sun to sun, to do what other men have done.

They follow in the beaten track,and in and out,

and forth and back,

And still their devious course pursue,to keep the paths that others do.

They keep the paths- a sacred groove, along which all their lives they move.

But how the wise old wood gods must laugh,

Who saw that first primeval calf....

Sam Walter Foss

Now, this is the poem as I remember it, but my source included a line I don't recall ever hearing, so I have included it, separately, even though I feel it's a bit redundant...

(Ah, many  things this tale might teach,But I am not ordained to preach.)

Just to be complete.

As a child, I found this poem to be hysterically funny, and never forgot it's point, so I guess that is why I have always been a bit of a rebel.And my favorite parts are:

"And thru the winding woodway stalked, because he wobbled, when he walked..."

and,"For men are prone to go it blind along the calf paths of the mind...and work away from sun to sun, to do what other men have done."

and"And in and out, and forth and back, and still their devious course pursue, to keep the paths that  others do."

I hope that you appreciate this work one quarter as much as I enjoyed bringing it to you, because it is as true today as it was in Sam Walter Foss's day who lived from 1858-1911! As far as I am concerned, he was well ahead of his time. What do you think? How many calves did you follow today?

OUI?

HOW EMOTIONAL AFFAIRS STARTS WITH HUSBANDS!

Once again, this is in response to the question,and having had some experience with a wayward husband...two, in fact, I can speak with some authority on the subject.In both cases, the wandering eye occurred after I was ill,and unable to completely respond and fulfill my husband's desires. One was just after my having had our baby, and without going into gross detail, my recovery time was complicated by an infection,which also snowballed into slowing the process of getting my figure back.As some men do, my first husband has an aversion to plump women, so not only did he begin to make unpleasant comments about how I should be "losing it",but he began to treat me differently.Being distracted by being a new mother,and ill, and trying to take care of the house and the baby, I must admit, that he probably began looking around then,but it was several months later when I realized that he had found a girlfriend.With all those complications, I still loved my husband, but there was no way I had any incentive to fight his desire to be single again.

But with my second husband,the situation was more clear cut and easier to read.As often happens, when a man's wife is ill, he  will turn to a co-worker,or associate with whom he spends a lot of time in pursuit of his career,and often falls into a dependent habit of turning to that confidant, when troubled.As my illness dragged on, from pneumonia to suda-monia, and infected my entire system, he grew restless and translated his needs from me to his female friend,and about the time they grew comfortable enough to get closer even at our own home, I caught them in several lies and finally, a compromising position, complete with hearing kissing noises, from the next room.

Now, if I had been smart,and wanted to keep my marriage, I would have closed my eyes to what was going on, and sooner or later, the affair would have ended,and I would have been recovered from my illness by then, and life would probably have gone on as usual. However,I did not, could not do that. Once I was positive that my suspicions were founded in fact, I not only confronted him with the fact that I knew the truth, but I also blew the whistle on her, to her husband. Yeah, I can almost hear you saying I shouldn't have done that, but there was a reason for me to do it. It was important for her husband to know that he was married to a princess roundheels, and I loved him. I could see that my marriage was falling apart, because we had talked about our feelings about cheating long before we got together, and he knew that I would not allow my man to sleep with another woman,and then come back to me.This was not pride, it was self-preservation. In this day and age, you can't fiddle around with STD's! So, when the confrontation took place, and he didn't ask forgiveness and make all the right sounds, I understood that he was not going to try to rectify the situation,and break off with her,and he volunteered to go.

So, in both cases, there was reason, no matter how feeble,and opportunity. Now, in defense of my second husband,I have to say I was far angrier with the other woman than I was with him. I am from the school that believes that it's in a man's nature to try: it's up to the woman to say NO! AND SHE,being my daughter-in-law, who professed to love me,and my son, should have said no,and she didn't. So, now you know.My husband ran off with my son's wife.And that, as they say is the rest of the story...and why I had to tell the other woman's husband, Yon son.

OUI?

A NOTE OF THANKS,FOR MY SON'S ACTIONS!!

At the risk of appearing prideful, may a mother take pride in her son's charecter?

The last several weeks have been rather difficult for Yon son.He works hard, and if he is lucky,he only gets one day off a week.If not lucky, he doesn't even get that one day. Today was particularly stressful, because we had a lot of things he had to attend to before he went to work,and most men, nay, most people, would have called in,and not even gone to work, but would have piled right back into bed, to catch up on some much needed sleep. But, he didn't. He did the right, the honorable thing, took care of the homefires,and went off to work, uncomplaining.His very first trip, was strange. He was given a note to go to an address he dropped off at last night.This does not ususally bode well, but he went, and when he got there, he was given a sealed envelope,and thanked for showing up,and dismissed. When he got back to his car, he opened the envelope, and in it was a thank you card, with beautiful sunflowers all over the front. Very surprised, he opened it,and this is what it said:

It was addressed to him, which I will not relate here, so instead, I substitute Yon.

Yon,

There is no amount of thanks for the wonderful, compassionate act of helping our Mom(named) into her apartments on the morning of 4/23/06. She felt so bad about not being able to tip you appropriately for your help, understanding,and compassion. And we, her family, cannot begin to say thank you enough. You are a wonderful person, and we hope this small compensation will express just a token of the appreciation that we feel for you. Thank you so much, and we'll keep you in our prayers.

                                                    signed, daughter and son of named mom.

(They used their names, I will not.I am sure if they wanted their names splashed all over the Internet, they would have done it themselves,so I am respecting their privacy in this way.Likewise, I do not name my son, because he also deserves his privacy. )

Well, as Yon son read this card, his eyes filled with tears,and he wept.From the time he was little on, Yon son has never gotten himself into trouble, but what he was "only trying to help." Long ago, that stopped, because he has found ways to help without creating problems,and every day I and others have reason to thank him, but this came from out of the blue,and it took him completely off-guard.So, he sat there, tears streaming down his cheeks,and praising God,and giving him all the honor and glory for this blessing, when he realized that what had fallen out of the card as he pulled it from the envelope was in his other hand, and he hadn't even looked at it. It looked to be a whole wad of one dollar bills.Just then, he got a "STAT" run from the hospital,to another hospital, and since he is the fastest driver they have, he gets the bulk of those runs.So, he put the card and the bills in his clipboard, wiped his eyes,and took off.It wasn't until much later that he was able to count it, and when he did, he realized it was a very handsome tip, indeed.He'll have to declare it, of course,and pay taxes on it,and tithe on it, but he will still have a few dollars left to enjoy a drink or a sandwich....but it is the card,and the loving thoughts expressed there that made him get all misty eyed,as well as this families promise to pray for him,which blessed him the most.And, from the way he came bounding through the door a while ago,and the brightness of his eyes as he told me about it,I think the Lord took his mind off the lack of a nap, at least for a little while.

So.May a Mother take pride in her son's  Charecter? No. All the Honor and Glory go to God.Everything he is, comes from God, I was just privilaged enough to be his Mother.

OUI?

SCAMS NOW SHOWING UP IN ILLINOIS!!

A Canadian Lottery scam is now showing up in Illinois. People are getting cashiers checks in the mail, and letters asking them to call the " Lottery representative" to collect the winnings.The letters, from a company calling itself "Shoppers Trust", is based in Ontario Canada, and the police are warning you not to respond to these letters. And now, here's a tip. You do not have to pay anything to collect winnings of any legitimate lottery!

Another scam that might find it's way into your mailbox, looks like a check for  Two thousand,five hundred dollars.It is made out to you,and if you cannot read beyond that, honey, your in big trouble. An acquaintance of mine got this thing, rushed out and cashed it,and come to find out, she is illiterate! I know this,now, only because she had no idea that by cashing this check, she was taking out a loan that had to be repaid, with interest and fees.This gimmick caught her,and It might catch you too, if you don't read every blasted word on anything that looks like a check you get, unexpected,and unsolicited in the mail,and since the terms of the loan are clearly spelled out on the front of the check, what Beneficial is doing is completely legal.It may not be ethical, but it is legal.Oh, and one more thing.When you cash this check, you get special checks to spend any way you want, except, you cannot use them to make their loan payment,and their interest rates keep going up, until you're paying over 28% a month.

Once again, not ethical, but legal.

So if you have a friend,or a loved one with this sort of gap in their education, you might want to appraise them of this particularly nasty bit of hocus-pokus.Forewarned is forearmed, you know.

OUI?

SHEILA REDINGTON,LOCAL PRE-SCHOOL TEACHER, DIES 5 DAYS AFTER THE ONSET OF MENINGITIS!!

A Galesburg teacher left the school early on Tuesday, complaining of a headache,and"not feeling well" and then died early Sunday morning! By Wednesday, she had been diagnosed with Meningiccal Meningitis, the bacterial form of the illness. Costa Catholic School closed down Wed. for cleaning,and disinfecting, and opened up again on Thursday.The whole school was shocked to learn of her demise five days later,on Sunday.Only about 7% of cases are fatal, but the Galesburg school is taking no chances,and students and teachers are on medication, as is Mrs. Redington's family,as a precaution, since not only did she teach pre-school, but was also a sponsor of the high school cheerleading squad,and was like a second mother to each of the girls. The sickness evidently responds well to antibiotics,when treated early.It is not being made known if Sheila did not go to the doctor right away, but since the school closed down for radical cleansing, the very next day from the beginning of symptoms, one assumes she didn't wait very long, which makes this whole story even scarier. Fortunately, no one else has been reported to have contracted the sickness. It begins with a headache,but once the illness is contracted, it attacks your brain and spinal cord. There is another  form of meningitis, which is caused by a virus, but it is a lot less severe. Apparently the Bacterial form is very infectious, but not as infectious as the mumps, and whooping cough, both of which are active in the Iowa-Illinois area right now. In fact, several new cases of Mumps were confirmed just today, bringing the Iowa total cases of Mumps up to about one thousand! And that with what has been thought to be a "dead" Disease. With all these illnesses popping up in our area right now, one wonders if there is some germ warfare going on!

OUI?

POST-EASTER PARTIES UPDATE!!

Well, Jenny is gone back to Waterloo, again.She left Friday, was sent back home Saturday. and then had to be back up there tonight, to see the doctors bright and early Monday morning. Yon son is not pleased, he thought he would have at least one more week-end with his wife, but these things happen. We both miss her when she is out on the road, but this time it is more than that.She injured her left knee. If they release her to go back to work tomorrow, that means she is going to be driving an 18 wheeler with a sore leg, and every time she shifts gears, she is going to be working that sore knee.

And yet, I think back on the Easter Campmeeting, and how blessed we all were that we could be all together throughout that, and how much fun we had, and I just know that the Lord is taking care of her.I don't mean to keep bringing myself up, because it was so wonderful that the Lord arranged that those two could experience such an in depth time of preaching and teaching, praise and worship, and bible study that took us all to a new level of spiritual understanding, but honestly, any young couple would benefit from just time to get closer to one another, and closer to God together.But they weren't the only ones blessed by this time. Just to see those two blonde heads bowed in prayer,shoulder to shoulder, hands sweetly intertwined,or voices lifted together in songs praising God...twice a day, morning and evening, day after day, for a week, those are sights and sounds that will calm and lighten my anxious moments for some time to come.

OUI?

MOMMA'S RANT #4!!

It's a story old as time, and it's no fairy tale.Your kids grow up, get married and move away,and move back. and move away again,and through it all, they have problems, and friends with problems, or in-laws,and outlaws, with problems, and they bring them to you to talk to.Times without number I have been called out of bed to make a pot of coffee,and let some poor soul sit in my kitchen and pour out their heartbreak, worry and fright,filling tissue after tissue with tears,and asking me for advice.Yon son brings them to me, because he knows there is practically nothing I have not heard,and I am not in the judging business.He also knows me to be a giant marshmallow, very tenderhearted,and that I have this "universal Mother" complex. Everybody is my kid,unless they prove to me that I can't trust them.And truthfully,I don't mind it.I feel it is part of my calling to be there for those who have come to the end of their rope,and are reaching out for someone to grab their hand,and tell them that it can be all okay.Shush the weeping, give them a shoulder to cry on, and pat them on the back and once I have heard the whole story, often the Lord will give me a new perspective of that situation to present to them, that they hadn't thought of before. But with some,this is where I find myself going into a rant....a real tizzy on them. See, some people don't want advice, they want a listening post.They are not looking for real solutions, they just want to moan and groan and cry,and carry on as though this is the end of the world, when in actuality, it is nothing of the kind, and there are many steps they can take to prevent further damage, either to their emotions, finances, or marital status.But anything I suggest is poo-pooed by, I tried that, it didn't work, or Oh, I can't do that,or they yes you to death, and then turn around and do just exactly the wrong thing.For instance,Lolly has a problem with her brother, who is on her checking account,but doesn't contribute to it, and she has just put her paycheck in the bank and they have had a huge fight. She is afraid he will wipe her account out,so I say to her, go to the bank and get your money out, and open it in another bank, but don't warn him that your going to do it.We talk it over,and she agrees. A few minutes later, I have to excuse myself to visit Mrs.Murphy, but when I come out of the bathroom, she is on the phone to her brother, and I can tell by the conversation that she has just lowered the boom on him, informing him that he's about to get a big surprise when he goes to the bank,and then she doesn't go to the bank the next day! Instead, she waits two days, goes out of town, and when she comes home, guess what? There is no money in her account! Well,DUH! It's enough to make a Universal mother rip handfuls of hair out of her head that her kids can be so stupid! It's just so simple! If you're tired of being used and taken advantage of, do NOT warn them that you are about to take back your life! Just, quick like a bunny take steps to cover your assets, and let the users be taken by surprise! This is not quantum physics here! It is simple logic! If you want to keep what you have, put it in your hot little hand, stuff it in your pocket,and run! But, do they do it, No! Do they leave that abusive boyfriend/husband,and find their own place, No! Why? Because they LOVE HIM! I can't leave him, I'm no good on my own, I don't want to be alone! Yee Gods! How can this be so difficult to get? If you don't appreciate what you've got, you'd better get what you can appreciate! I would think most people would rather have the peace and quiet and comfort of being alone, as opposed to having someone around who is either going to rob them blind, or use them for a punching bag,or go off like a roman candle  screaming at them if dinner is one minute late being put on the table. But all of that is nothing compared to what inevitably comes next.It can occur as soon as the next  day or as long as a year later, but somewhere, sometime in the future, there will be a repeat performance,starring all the same characters,and that is when Momma's rant really gets stirred up! Names, dates and places change, but the basic theme goes something like this:

"You know, the last time you were here, talking about------------(insert antagonists name here), I gave you some very sound advice, which you chose to ignore, or avoid, or discount,and even gave me excuses why you couldn't do that, or you just flat out lied to me, said you would follow my suggestions, and then, did something completely different...which I warned you would turn out badly. Now a (choose one) week, month, year... later, here you are, right back where you were then, only now the situation is much worse,and you've been,or are( choose one) broke and have to file bankruptcy,  beaten and have to go to a shelter, swindled and he's run off with the babysitter, and you have come to me for advice once again. Well, I am sorry for you, but if you came looking for a way out, I already gave you the best I could at the time,and now it's much worse. If you are looking for sympathy, I gave you that last time too, and it didn't help.I can't make up the deficit in your finances,and even though I feel sympathy for you, I won't commiserate with you, because you had a chance to get yourself out of the situation at the onset,and you didn't take it.Now, your going to have to grow up,wipe your tears away,and be an adult about this.Now your going to have to make those hard choices,and do whatever you need to,while you have the time to make a difference in your life.You shot your mouth off,and warned him/her/them what you planned to do,and then, you didn't do it, so what can you expect me to do for you now? I love you, but I am very much afraid I have to wash my hands of the whole affair,since you won't listen to reason when you have the chance! Please forgive me for losing my temper with you, but you leave me no choice! I can't bail you out, and I have no intention of  throwing my whole household into an uproar over your problems simply because you are too dumb to listen to reason while you still have an opportunity to change things. And, if it is too late, then you are just going to have to live with the fact, and do the best you can to live with all your happy little decisions that I warned you in advance would not work! Now off your duff,and on your feet,and go see, (choose one) your lawyer, the doctor/the hospital, or your banker,and stop being such a procrastinating wimp.You don't have time to sit and drink coffee and bawl, you've got problems to solve!"

Okay...I didn't say all those things...I don't think. But OOHhh! I wanted to!

Maybe next time, when she isn't crying so hard...

OUI?

TEACHERS AND STUDENTS NOW HAVING "RELATIONSHIPS"! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?

You know, it used to be that young, pretty teachers taught the lower classes, such as kindergarten,up through third grade, because administrators were mostly men, and they knew what young men were capable of. Now, it's like they haven't a clue what is possible, until a female teacher comes up pregnant by one of her students. Now, I don't want to shock you, but teen-aged boys are noted for having crushes on pretty teachers.They ogle them, flirt with them, and behave slavishly if they have the slightest indication that they might be able to get them alone.Once alone, they will do anything, say anything to be able to go further and further with them.Since the sexual revolution,women seem to have lost their backbone when it comes to being able to put their foot down, and order a boy to take their hands off, or to slap a man's face.I never had any trouble with saying no, but a great many women of my acquaintance seem to have dismissed that word from their vocabulary...even the intelligent ones who have gone through collage,and will be spending a great deal of time in class rooms with young men who will find them prime love interests.I for one, would like to send out questionnaires, and find out if any of these teachers were told the facts of life, when it involves unethical, immoral behavior, and what is appropriate for them to do, given the vast differences in ages between themselves and their pupils,and how to conduct oneself when dealing with a flirtatious student. Somewhere along the line, these collages have fallen down on the job if they don't have a course on keeping a proper distance  between teacher and class members.

How a woman in her twenties can look upon a boy of thirteen up to eighteen and consider herself "In Love" with such a childish figure is more than I can figure out! Wouldn't a woman be able to come to the conclusion that a student in her classroom is still a child, all by herself? It doesn't matter if he knew her before she became his teacher,or if they dated, or if she still has feelings for him.Some things are absolutely right and some things are absolutely wrong.

Of course, I know that some very young men can be very charming and persuasive,however, the three latest teachers who fell to temptation are extremely attractive, and I shall never be convinced that they hadn't already had their share of attention by the opposite sex, so it's not like they had never had to fend off someone in their past, who by virtue of their age or other status or circumstance made the relationship inappropriate. No matter which way you look at this thing, one idea stands out crystal clear to me.Teachers are not screened well enough.Whether because the School administrators are so anxious to hire teachers, and so they let down their standards just to fill these positions, or because they have no adequate test to weed out those of a promiscuous nature,I have no way of knowing.Perhaps the school board no longer cares if they have women teachers who are just flat" Princess Round-heels"types, but were I to have a young child of school age, I would for sure be taking up a petition requiring the school officials to hold them and the teachers they hired to a higher moral standard than has been exhibited since the turn of the century!

OUI?