This story is not a happy tale, but it is true, and a sore burden on my heart, so I am going to tell it.It starts out, as so many do, with a young lady, pretty, sweet, smart and impatient to be with the man she loves, and so, after making some silly choices, her mother gives her permission, and she is married.So, she and her young husband and their new baby...(I told you she made some silly choices) set up housekeeping, and after several false starts, the husband and father gets a job, and then they have a second baby...and then a third. By this time it is obvious that one income alone is not going to be enough, and the mother of three finds a job of her own, and then another, better job, and does them well. Now she is out in the workforce, and being noticed, not only for her intellect and abilities, but for her good looks as well, and she notices she is being noticed.Then in quick succession, she falls in with a social group that brings her two things. Opportunities for better jobs, and for coming in contact with the opposite sex. She meets a woman impressed with her drive and ambition, who has contacts in a firm looking for someone they can train for a high-paying career, and she begins to flirt with men who give her the kind of attention her tired husband just can't dredge up anymore. To put it bluntly, she says yes, to both.So, she takes the new job, and her three kids, and moves on, leaving husband in the dust.She buys a new car, and finds a new house, and very soon, she finds husband number two, and together they have two kids. By now, Mommy has a lot of responsibility at work and little time to spend at home,and when she is at home, she is still working, on the computer.She is on call, 24-7, and making great money, but she is also spending great money.She hires live-in baby-sitters who teach the children to do most of the housekeeping, and Daddy number two does a lot of the cooking and the bathing and the laundry too, after he gets home from work.By now the three oldest kids begin to see that mommy is so busy working and with a busy social life, that she doesn't have much time left.In fact, sometimes, she doesn't make it home at all, except to shower and change clothes and go back to work. When she is home, she yells at the kids to leave her alone, and to go do their chores.Husband number two and mommy begin to have words, and they are not pleasant ones.Then, husband number two moves out, and mommy now has uncles coming to visit,or she leaves the babysitters to take care of the children, and she goes to see them....sometimes for days at a time.At last she tells the children they will soon be six instead of five,and she changes jobs, making it even longer to for her to go from work to home, and when she gets home one night, husband number two is there, and they have such a fight the children call their grandmother from a bedroom phone, and grandmother calls the police.Soon the police begin coming a lot, and the three oldest children call their father, and ask if they can come and live with him.One day, mommy comes home, and the three oldest children are gone,along with the live-in babysitters, the water is shut off because the rent hasn't been paid and the people from the furniture store are at the door, ready to take the furniture away.But, mommy has new clothes and calls a new friend, and soon all the bills are paid and the new friend begins to stay with mommy. With no built in babysitters, mommy begins to take the two youngest children to their grandmother every day so she can go to work, and soon it becomes all day and some nights with grandmother, and the new friend moves out.Then in rapid succession, mommy has the new baby, changes jobs again, and finds lots of new friends,puts all the children in day care,and begins having trouble not only making it home every night, but also picking the children up from day care.Grandmother and her friends come to the rescue several times, calling husband number two to pick the three children up from their homes, whom they had picked up by taxi cabs.He always does so,and is happy to see the children, and they are happy to see him. Even the new baby, who doesn't look like anybody else in the family. Then one day, mommy announces that she is taking a new job, even farther away, and she and the three children will be moving to a new town, with a man who will be husband number three.The move is made, and then mommy goes to court, mother of six, and comes out, with only custody of three.Suddenly, mommy loses interest in working, and begins to spend time at home a lot.She begins to call in sick, or her car broke down, or her husband won't let her have the keys to the car so she can leave.People at work begin to see bruises on her, and she says she falls down a lot. Kind persons offer to help her, but she rejects their help.Finally, she is fired from her job, and goes on welfare.Husband number three is supposed to be gone, but he is there anyway.Husband number two is paying child support, but not through the court, so the state goes after him.For some unknown, incompressible reason, all at once, the grandmother hears that two of the children are now living with the father, husband number two.The third child, the baby, is with yet another man, and his wife.With no word of explanation, mommy just brought them to him, dumped them off, and there they have been for roughly three months.He works hard, and keeps them fed and clean, but they only have about a weeks worth of clothes, and no winter coats.He has no papers to show anybody to put them in school, or get any kind of assistance, which he desperately needs.No birth certificates, no custody papers, not even a note from their mommy. He can't even get a thanksgiving basket from Salvation Army.He doesn't make much money, but he loves his kids,and would like to do right by them.At this point, this little family is in limbo, unable to even submit an application for food stamps or a medical card. Since he can't get those things, there will be no help at Christmas time from Toys For Tots, no coats or other clothes from the usual agencies, no food for the little one from W.I.C....nothing. And all because mommy lost interest in being mommy.
It is a sad story, isn't it? I don't know this man very well, I have only met him a time or two, but I know the children, and they are darling, and I know the grandmother, who is heartbroken that she is so strapped there is nothing she can do to help them.She can barely put food on her own table, much less feed anyone else.This situation haunts me. How any mother could do such a thing is beyond me.And now with winter setting in, and those children with no coats,or boots, or probably shoes that will fit, along with everything else, all I can think of is, how can I help? Where can I tell this man to go to get the assistance that he needs for these kids? If I had it to give, I would do it, but I don't. All I can do is pray that somewhere, someone with compassion will hear of this need, and have a solution.
OUI?
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